Yeah, you heard that right, I’m fat. Been fat for a while now. Had lots of excuses for being fat. I’d blame the fibro, blame my lack of metabolism, blame yadda blame. But you know, I wasn’t always fat. Yes, I’ve got a large frame but I wasn’t always *fat*. And avoidance and denial do nothing but make it worse. Avoiding photos so I don’t have to see it doesn’t make it go away. My back hurts, my knees hurt, and honestly my health is an issue because I allow it to be. It’s not like I didn’t know what I needed to do.

So I’m seeing a new doctor. One that doesn’t make me want to scream. One that isn’t going to pump me full of pills.

I’m getting help for my digestion and metabolism and thyroid and adrenals and all that stuff that is currently pretty screwed up.

I am walking a mile a day, uphill.

John and I have Y memberships we haven’t used since we got them in May, so now we are going every Wednesday to swim.

I run up and down our stairs 4+ times a day because they’re there.

I joined a social network for exercising which, oddly enough, helps motivate me to get my ass out of this chair.

We do eat well, we do. Only eat out once a week and then it’s usually fish or chicken. We eat fish and veggies at home. No soda. No junk food.

When I was younger and healthy I weighed in at 175 lbs. That put my BMI at 26.6 which is a healthy range.

Right now, at my worst, I am 258 lbs and 39.2 BMI, which is bad. Let’s just say bad and leave it at that.

So the goal is to get back below BMI 30. For me that will be 197 lbs.

But I know that’s not enough. So the real goal is to get back below 180. That’s 78 lbs to lose.

I want to be healthy.
I want to not be so tired.
I want to not feel so old.
I want the energy to do fun things.
I want the energy to do even more fun things with John 😛
I want to not be so sore.
I want to be able to fit into nice clothes.
I want to not look like a cow in a wedding dress.

This is Week 1.

One Response

  1. Kudos. I really hope you manage it, someday I’m hoping to give myself a kick in the ass like this too. Everyone tells me ‘you’re not fat’ or ‘you’re not old’. I FEEL it. Every day waking up, you remember how easy it was when you were a 20-something. Every day looking down, you see the difference between what your body is now, and what it used to be. Aches and pains happen where none used to. And at least for me, this is only at 32. I see people who’ve supposedly fought it off, saying it doesn’t have to be that way, and I wonder daily when I’m going to get the ambition to make it so for myself.

    I think it’s finally just getting sick of it, or getting the oomph to do something about it and stick with the plan, that will kill that. And, maybe if you have some luck, toss me some ideas. I’m hoping the motorcycle will help, I’ve already noticed an urge to go out more often. As well, it definitely takes more out of me physically to ride the bike than sit in a car. If I don’t kill myself first, maybe it’ll be a good start.

    Anyway, Keep at it! And for what it’s worth, you don’t look like a cow, and anyone telling you so ought to be shot. But you do what makes YOU feel best about yourself.


    August 30, 2012 at 11:02 am

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